Depressed and need a cure

Depressed and need a cure

QUESTION:

your avatar   A miserable 18-year-old woman

My mother sent me to get help when I was around 15 after I told her I was ready to give up and kill myself. They told me I was what they called "clinically depressed". I went to a psychologist for about a month and thought it was useless because she told me my problem but no way to solve it. I am now 18 and still in the same situation. I have just been to another psychologist and it was the same thing. My mother thinks she can help me by reading books about depression or anything else she can get her hands on.

I still party every weekend and go to school and work but I haven't really enjoyed myself. I also feel I have no "real friends," or should I say friend, other than the party people I see every weekend. My mom gets mad because I won't get close or share my feelings with her. I don't want to get to close and then be left behind again. So I really haven't sat down and just had girl talk in years. I pretty much like to just sit in my room away from everyone and read or watch TV.

Is there a cure for what I have? I really would like to wake up without saying "Damn, another day."

ANSWER:

    Bryan M. Knight, Ph.D.

Of course there's a cure. You would have to use your courage, however. The "cure" won't just happen. But if you become involved in activities besides weekend parties and TV in your room you could meet people with whom you could form real friendships and thus enjoy "girl talk".

A temporary help in this direction could be St John's Wort, which you can get from a health-food store. This is a natural anti-depressant with no side effects. Check first with your doctor.

Is your school and/or work meaningful? Perhaps you need to find work or schooling which inspires you. Write down what you'd like to do with your life -- and then figure out how you'll achieve those goals.

You don't say anything about your childhood. Perhaps there's some trauma or abuse that's at the root of your depression.

Since you are in therapy, it is important to understand that most therapies take a time to work, and that progress depends heavily on the relationship with the therapist. If you respect and feel comfortable with the psychologist, continue. If not, find one who is more compatible. (How to find one is explained on my website).

The task of a traditional therapist is to help you figure out for yourself how to end your depression -- not to give you advice. This means that the solution is then yours, not something imposed from outside.

If you allow yourself to feel your feelings (which may include anger, guilt and shame as well as sadness) while you're with your therapist, and share these feelings with him or her, you'll go a long way to resolving your depression.

This is not something you can "snap out of." But if there's no biological basis for your depression you can work your way out of it through psychotherapy.

Your diet may play an important part. Alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, can all be depressing, as can certain foods (which vary from person to person).

Dr. Knight

This question was answered by Dr. Bryan M. Knight. Bryan M. Knight, MSW, Ph.D., holds a degree in psychology from Sir George Williams University, a Master's in social work from McGill University, and a doctorate in counseling from Columbia Pacific University for his dissertation, “Professional Love: The Hypnotic Power of Psychotherapy”. His 39 years in private practice have taught him to appreciate the uniqueness of each individual, and how to strengthen the client's positive values. Dr. Knight's innovation, NetHypnosis ™, offers therapeutic hypnosis to the public over the Internet. For people looking for a hypnotherapist in their hometown, Dr. Knight has created The International Registry of Professional Hypnotherapists. He is the author of numerous articles and several books, including "The People Paradox", "The Laughter Book", "Enjoying Single Parenthood", "Love, Sex & Hypnosis: Secrets of Psychotherapy", "Health and Happiness with Hypnosis", and "How to Avoid a Bad Relationship".For more information visit: http://www.hypnosis.org/

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