{"id":5529,"date":"2018-07-12T10:24:57","date_gmt":"2018-07-12T14:24:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/queendomblog.wordpress.com\/?p=5529"},"modified":"2018-07-12T10:24:57","modified_gmt":"2018-07-12T14:24:57","slug":"depression-lies-part-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.queendom.com\/blog\/?p=5529","title":{"rendered":"The lies depression will tell you (Part 1)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I am in a constant battle with my mind. It\u2019s like that iconic scene you’ll see in all western movies:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Scene: High noon. Two cowboys stand a few yards apart, staring each other down. A tumbleweed rolls across the screen.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Me: It\u2019s time for us to stop this feud. We\u2019re not enemies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My mind: Go ahead\u2026think something positive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Me: Is that a threat?!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My mind: Remember that time your so-called best friend stopped talking to you? It was your fault. She still hates you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Me: Stop it! That\u2019s not true!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My mind: You\u2019re a black sheep. Everyone in your family gossips about you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Me: That\u2019s enough!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My mind: That top you\u2019re wearing doesn\u2019t go with those pants.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Me: *sniff* You\u2019re right.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s hard enough to deal with negative thoughts as it is, but when you\u2019re suffering from depression, it\u2019s like a never-ending tidal wave. When I compared the thoughts and attitudes of depressed<\/a> and non-depressed people, what I discovered was a distinct pattern of brow-beating, pessimistic, defeatist, and guilt-ridden beliefs. To put it simply, depression can really mess with your head. Here are some of the lies your depression will tell you:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou should be ashamed of yourself. You deserve to feel guilty.\u201d<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

A wise teacher once told me that guilt is \u201ca waste of energy\u201d. Now, should you feel remorse when you\u2019ve done something wrong? Yes. Should you apologize? Absolutely. Should you punish yourself for years on end? No.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019ve hurt or wronged someone, do what you can to make amends. Even if you\u2019re not forgiven, try to find some solace in the fact that you did your best to mend bridges. Use the experience as a lesson learned, as a reminder to treat others with respect. Do not use the experience as a ceaseless excuse to make yourself feel like crap.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou will never get over this.\u201d<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

You can and you will, regardless of your circumstances. Emotions are transient. This means that all emotions, even negative ones, will dissipate after some time. No matter what you are going through, you will reach a point when it won\u2019t hurt as much, where the negative emotions surrounding it won\u2019t feel as intense. Essentially, while things may seem dark now, they will lighten eventually.<\/p>\n\n\n

\n
\"caterpillar_butterfly\"<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI am not _____ enough.\u201d<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Fill in the blank. It could be \u201csmart,\u201d \u201cattractive,\u201d \u201cthin,\u201d \u201crich,\u201d \u201csuccessful,\u201d or simply not \u201cgood\u201d enough. Whatever your chosen word, realize that it\u2019s nothing more than an artificial limitation that you are placing on yourself. The world is filled with people who have defied seemingly impossible odds. Need proof? Read the life stories of Nelson Mandela, Franklin D. Roosevelt, Helen Keller, Oprah Winfrey, or Stephen Hawking, just to name a few.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat can go wrong will go wrong.\u201d<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Hope is in short supply when you\u2019re depressed. You start to overanalyze things, creating doubts and problems that weren\u2019t there before. And when you go into a situation with a defeatist attitude, you\u2019re already setting yourself up for disappointment. Everything you say, everything you do, and every decision you make will be a reflection of this belief. While it\u2019s very difficult to take the leap from pessimism to extreme optimism, try to take just one step in that direction: Prepare for the worst, and then go in with a hopeful attitude. Or, failing that, go into the situation without any<\/em> expectations, and see how things play out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI don\u2019t deserve love.\u201d<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Depression will make you believe that you are unlovable; this simply isn\u2019t true, however, and always stems from a lack of self-love<\/em>. The greatest advice I can ever offer is this: Don\u2019t look to other people to recognize your strengths, to tell you what makes you special, or to give you the love that you yearn for. You need to discover that in yourself \u2013 and once you do, everything will seem to fall into place. Ever been around someone who makes you so happy you just want to bask in their energy? A happy, giggling baby, for example. It\u2019s because they love themselves so fully that the love kind of just spills out of them, affecting everyone around them.<\/p>\n\n\n

\n
\"crack_light\"<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Insightfully yours,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Queen D<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Depression is like a Western movie showdown in your head, whispering stuff like “you’ll never get over this” in cowboy villain voice. 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