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August 21, 2018 - Welcome Guest!

Advice » Sexpertise

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Am I a cartoon freak?

Question:

I am a twenty-one year old male who has never had a sexual experience with anyone. Nevertheless, I'm pretty sure I'm gay. I occasionally view male pornography on the Internet and while I am not completely turned off by women, I concentrate my sexual energy on men. I masturbate frequently. Again, women will sometimes be the focus of my fantasy, but at orgasm it is always a man's body that plays in my mind. I have recently taken to viewing anime (or cartoon) gay porn and I absolutely love it. While I still enjoy the real thing (pictures of actual naked men) I find myself watching animated sex more and more often.

Is it unhealthy to look at cartoon pornography? Am I too detached from reality?

Frank (21 year-old man)

Answer:

Who is to say what is sexually normal or erotically healthy? I'll not venture to do so, but will not deny that many are turned on by novelty. Cartoon sex is often exaggerated or introduces the unusual in other ways. It also allows us to look at sexual anatomy and sexual activities from that detached perspective you mentioned.

At twenty-one should you have accumulated multiple sexual experiences? That's your choice... there is no number of encounters that you are required to match. Masturbation is certainly a natural and normal sexual outlet in the absence of a real partner, and it is "safe sex". People have the right to prefer masturbation to partner sex, and males are quite likely to use visual stimulation to enhance the self-pleasuring experience.

Ask yourself if you feel you have made a choice in avoiding partner sex. Are you using your masturbation to avoid searching for a partner, or are you using it to wait until you are ready? (Remember, sexual orientation is not a choice, but what we do with our attraction is.) Ask yourself if you feel guilty about your use of visual stimulation, and if so, why? (Remember that men like visual stimulation and novelty adds another powerful component to its impact.)

If you feel that you need to become more involved with partners of your preference but are stopping yourself, seek the help of a gay therapist or counselor. Our sexuality is to be enjoyed, and we can decide how we are going to enjoy it. Guilt has no place in the expression of this gift.

Bob Birch

Robert W. Birch, Ph.D., is a retired sex therapist, now identifying himself as a sexologist and adult sexuality educator. He now devotes his time to writing educational and self-help books for adults.

For more information visit the site or contact information page on QueenDom.

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