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November 16, 2018 - Welcome Guest!

Advice » Sexpertise

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Need a Cure


How do I cure Vaginismus?

Anonymous Woman


Vaginismus is the involuntary contraction of the muscles surrounding the vaginal opening, typically causing pain and often preventing penetration. The tensing might be seen in the thigh and abdominal muscles also, and usually (if the woman even goes for a pelvic exam) it is quite apparent to the examining physician. Vaginismus might be apparent from the very first attempt to insert a tampon or the first attempt at intercourse (Primary Vaginismus). Primary Vaginismus can often be traced to a rigid, moralistic background in which the woman was taught that sex is dirty or sinful, or is taught that it is a very painful experience that women endure to placate a man. Vaginismus might begin after the woman has experienced pleasurable intercourse followed by something traumatic (Secondary Vaginismus), such as rape, the experience of pain from an unusually large penis, or some other physically and/or psychologically painful experience.

Solving a problem is easiest with the guidance of a certified sex therapist, and more time will eventually be spent on what to do, rather than on why it happened. Instruction is usually given in learning to relax...total body relaxation. Instruction is also given on how to locate and then relax the vaginal muscles (actually all the muscles making up the pelvic floor). Therapists will usually give instructions on using dilators, and the woman will begin at home to insert very small dilators. As she learns to relax, over time she will increase the length and diameter of the dilators. There would also be instruction given to the partner, who must abstain from attempting intercourse during the early stages of the treatment.

Treatment of Vaginismus with a cooperative couple is usually quite successful, but might take six months to totally resolve. A woman who wants to work on it herself would need to devote a fair amount of time. There are some videos available that can help, but finding dilators can be a bit difficult. Most dildos sold by sex toy shops and sites are too big.

My best advice to a woman suffering from Vaginismus is to find a qualified sex therapist.

Robert W. Birch, Ph.D., is a retired sex therapist, now identifying himself as a sexologist and adult sexuality educator. He now devotes his time to writing educational and self-help books for adults.

For more information visit the site or contact information page on QueenDom.

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