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November 19, 2018 - Welcome Guest!

Advice » Mental Health

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Depressed and Suicidal


I'm unhappy with my life for no reason. I have everything I could possibly want. However, for some reason I don't feel loved or wanted in this world; I feel like the world has turned against me. I told my parents about it, and they said I could see a doctor but I didn't go. My brother who was also depressed at one time told me that doctors make it worse.

I punish myself when I feel that something is my fault, like when I get into fights with my parents or make my parents fight. I cut myself with glass or a needle, or continuously snap a rubber band on my arm until it welts. I think I'm going to end up dying through suicide, because I do try to kill myself sometimes.

Why do you think I am so unhappy with my life when I have everything I want?

BrittBritt (14 year-old woman)


Dear BrittBritt,

The way you feel and the things you have been doing do not mean that you are a bad person, or that you are crazy. Rather, you are being tortured by depression. I had the same problem when I was your age. I know how terrible it was for me, so I have an idea of how it is for you.

Get this thought into your head: You do not need to be punished. You are not guilty of anything, you do not need a doctor and you are not sick. You have developed certain ways of thinking and feeling because when you were little, they helped you make sense of the world around you. At that time, they were useful. Now, they make you miserable. You need to change them.

The good news is that you can. I did it and many thousands of other people in our situation as well. A lot of research has been done on depression, and it can be conquered. You can do it.

Ask your parents to find a psychologist who is competent at using the tools of "Cognitive-Behavioral", "Interpersonal" or "Narrative" therapy; even better would be someone who uses more than one of these. A person like this will be able to help you defeat depression in 4 to 8 sessions. This is only a guess of course, because every person is different. Besides, it's not a race to see how quickly you can win. The thing is to do it.

If you read this, send me an email and let me know how you are doing.

Have a good life. You can.


This question was answered by Dr. Bob Rich. Dr. Rich has 30+ years of experience as a psychotherapist. Dr. Rich is also a writer and a "mudsmith". Bob is now retired from psychological practice, but still works with people as a counselor.

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