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February 20, 2018 - Welcome Guest!

Advice » Personality

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My name is BJ and my question is why is it so common for women to lust after or fall for their therapists? I was in a group therapy situation about 1 year ago and the man whose care I was under was completely spellbinding. He was well-spoken, very educated, perfectly groomed, smelled scrumptious and from the moment I saw him, I wanted him to make love to me. I watched every move he made and called him for weeks after I was discharged from the program. He was always glad to hear from me, but now I find myself longing for him. Are there any answers?

BJ, 32-year-old woman


The therapeutic relationship is a very powerful one. The person in therapy receives unconditional positive regard from the therapist, along with a strong bond of acceptance that may be a totally "new" experience. It is only natural for a client to become attached to this type of relationship, thus creating a gateway for romantic and/or sexual fantasies. His feelings for you should always be professional. As for your longing for him, this will eventually taper off as you get closer to independence and healing.

The best to you,

Tina Reed, MA, LPC

This question was answered by Tina Reed, MA, LPC. Tina is a licensed Professional Counselor in the state of Illinois, and is also certified by the National Resource Center for Family-Centered Practice.

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