Personal Development

What it really means to be “self-aware”

by Queen D, May 30, 2018

Imagine spending a month climbing a sacred mountain, in search of the wise guru who resides in a small monastery at the top. You stretch your hand over the final peak and, drained and exhausted, pull yourself over. You plod ahead, step by painful step, to the monastery doors, your body sore, your lips and […]

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Mental Health & Well-Being

The slippery slope of “other-dependent” self-esteem

by Queen D, May 24, 2018

Let’s take a few minute to test what I like to call “social esteem,” which is basically my fancy way of saying your ability to handle rejection on social media: Test #1: You write what you feel is a brilliant, funny, or poignant post on Facebook or Twitter but it gets absolutely no likes/retweets. How […]

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Attitude & Lifestyle

A shopping addiction isn’t just a money problem

by Queen D, May 16, 2018

It’s hard for me to pin down the exact reason why I hate shopping. I think it’s a combination of the crowds, the lack of parking, the pushy salespeople, and the need to part with my hard-earned cash. Don’t mistake this for miserliness – I spend more on other people than I do on myself. […]

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Mental Health & Well-Being

The thoughtlessness of overthinking (Part 2)

by Queen D, May 9, 2018

In last week’s blog, I began a discussion on the many downsides of rumination. It’s that oh-so-fun process of mentally turning a problem inside out and upside down in Cirque du Soleil fashion, with nothing to show for it except a string of sleepless nights, some bags under my eyes, and a wrinkle that wasn’t […]

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Mental Health & Well-Being

The thoughtlessness of overthinking (Part 1)

by Queen D, May 2, 2018

I am a ruminator. Master level 99. I can take an innocent comment or minor situation and turn it inside out, upside down, take it down the street, around the corner, through the Bermuda Triangle and back. Here’s what happens to excessive ruminators like me: We over-analyze situations so pedantically that we make them a […]

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Personal Development

A lack of popularity is not as bad as a lack of tact

by Queen D, April 25, 2018

I’ve never quite understood the dynamics of high school, at least not my personal experience. The people who were popular were cruel, two-faced, and hateful, and totally oblivious to the amount of damage that insults and ostracism could do to the self-esteem, the very spirit, of a young, naïve mind. Those, like me, who were […]

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Attitude & Lifestyle

The Morning Pep Talk: Words we should all wake up to

by Queen D, April 20, 2018

For some it’s coffee. For others it’s a vigorous workout. For most of us, however, a morning ritual consists of the simple matter of trying to find a reason to roll out of bed. We all have a higher self, whether you call it your soul, inner being, God, your conscience, consciousness or the universe. […]

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Personality

Why do people avoid asking for help?

by Queen D, April 11, 2018

It’s a question I often ask of myself. I have the luxury of having at least a few close friends and family members who I can talk to when I am going through a difficult time. I did so just last week – but I also found myself hesitating, my finger hovering over the call […]

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Attitude & Lifestyle

Optimist, pessimist, or realist? The advantages & disadvantages of different outlooks

by Queen D, April 4, 2018

Whenever I think of optimists, an image of a group of hippies pops into my head. They’re in a field, wearing flowers in their hair, singing with the birds as butterflies land on their fingertips. They’re airy and carefree, blissfully unaware of the problems going on in the world. Pessimists, on the other hand, dredge […]

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Mental Health & Well-Being

Don’t react well to failure? Blame your parents (a little)

by Queen D, March 28, 2018

Yes, regular readers of my blog know I don’t advocate blame. Parenting style does have a major impact on a child’s development, but you can’t spend the rest of your life blaming your parents for your hang-ups or unhappiness. At some point, you have to take full control of your personal growth. However, I write […]

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Personal Development

The Multiplicity of Empathy

by Queen D, March 21, 2018

I never truly grasped the importance of empathy until I used it with people I didn’t like…OK, that I hated. It’s easy to sympathize with a friend. Got dumped? Yup, I know how you feel, my friend. Don’t get along with your parents? I’m with you, buddy. Life stressing you out? Preach. Love picking on […]

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Mental Health & Well-Being

Self-esteem affects everything you are & everything you do (Part 2)

by Queen D, March 14, 2018

In a previous blog, we started looking at the substantial impact that self-esteem has on every aspect of your character – your view of the world, your attitude, your ability to assert yourself, be independent, motivate yourself, and handle your emotions. Here are some additional factors that can be enhanced by working on your self-esteem…or […]

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